With roughly half of all marriages now ending in divorce, we all know family or friends who have made the decision to separate or to divorce.

Sometimes it is easy to take sides, especially when we assume that we know "what really happened".  With this "knowledge" often comes anger.  We blame the one we think is at fault.

But why do we react this way?  Perhaps we need to stop and question our own emotions.  Are they really justified?  Is our anger really righteous or Godly?

Firstly, what is the source of our "knowledge"?

How much do we really know about the situation?  Do we know this because we were there in person and heard and/or saw it first-hand?  Or are we relying on somebody else's recollection of events?

If we were there, do we still know the whole story?  Is there a background setting that we do not understand?  Remember, only God sees all things.

On the other hand, if our "knowledge" is from somebody else, is it really true or is it just that person's opinion?  Is it objectively true, or is it just perception?  Remember, it is easy to jump to conclusions when we only have some of the information.

Secondly, do we have a Godly reason to be angry?

If only God knows all things, should we be this angry that someone else has "stuffed up"?  Is our feeling of anger really justified, or are we just venting someone else's poison?  What has this person done to us to "deserve" this feeling of wrath?

If Godly anger needs to be resolved on a daily basis, why are we letting this continue?

Thirdly, who are we to be angry?

The apostle Paul taught, "As it is written, There is none righteous, no, not one", for everyone of us has sinned and fallen short of the glory of God (Romans 3:10, 23).  Not one of us is perfect.  Not one of us, even if we have grown up in a Christian home, can claim to be righteous before God.

Fourthly, what have we done to make peace?

Have we shut someone out of our life because we think they have sinned or are to "blame"?  How is that righteous or fair?  Only false religions do the opposite to what God has commanded.  Not one of us has the right to judge another person, so why are we excluding someone or treating them poorly?

Unresolved anger just destroys.

It serves no useful purpose.  It is unscriptural and sinful.  Are we going to let it destroy our relationships or are we going to sort things out?  Are we even looking for a solution?  Or have we woven ourselves into the problem?

What people choose to believe is for them to decide, but is it based on facts or hearsay?
Does it build up and edify or does it tear down and destroy?

What have you personally done to bring about a resolution or a reconciliation?

Or are you just adding to the mythology and the gossip, and giving power to a psuedo-Victim?  When was the last time you personally spoke to the person you have been working against or complaining about?

Let's remember the words of the apostle Paul, in Ephesians 4:31, "Let all bitterness, and wrath, and anger, and clamour, and evil speaking, be put away from you, with all malice".  Amen.